I am not like the other women.

It was the end of July, a day which started out probably just ok, ended with me being in the emergency room.

I returned from work as usual by 11.35pm, showered and went to bed, husband man was awake and waiting for his sleeping pills a.k.a Me. I pretended not to understand the situation and just went under the covers for a well deserved rest.

He scooched closer and tried to initiate sex, I backed farther away and told him I needed to rest and so does he, he protested that he hasn't been able to sleep well since my friend came around (she had by this time left two days prior), and I said, one more night wouldn't kill him, she should 'half' sleep how he had been doing in the last week, he protested again, reminding me my position as woman in the society, but all I heard was 'you are my sleeping pill, and I need you to sleep'

This angered me and of cause word battle began, he tried to force himself on me and I fought back while repeating to him that I am not like the other women before me or the stereotypical women he watches in Nigerian movies, I will not cower to the ground shielding my face while the man uses me a fitness exercise instrument, I will fight back however i can and with every strength in me, resulting in a full blown physical combat which resulted in destroying of the room, bump on my forehead and a trip to the emergency room.

When the physical altercation was over, I dressed up, went outside and called the police. their arrival was the only reason his daughter who was in the adjacent room was aware of what went down. He wasn't found at home when they arrived, but was told to not return to the house for 2 weeks, (surely I didn't obey this law, because it is in my nature to keep giving, so I only let him stay out for 2 nights) 

When he returned home, he blamed Jennifer for my action, remember Jennifer? from the previous post, the one who is divorced, my friend from Tallinn, I asked him if Jennifer asked him to hit me or if she told me to fight back if my husband tried to force himself on me, and if she didn't tell me that, does it mean I would have allowed him rape him if I didn't have Jennifer in my life? needless to say Jennifer's reputation in my marriage got to an all time low, barely three days after leaving my house.

I had to make a report down at the station  two days after the incident, and I was asked if I wanted to keep the record of what happened incase of a divorce in the future, and I said No, that I wasn't planning on having a divorce, that this would not happen again that the report should be trashed (in hindsight, this was a foolish decision).

There hasn't been further physical violence, but phycological, emotional and financial violence are in the struggle for the first place.

They see you smiling on pictures and posting memes all the time, they have no idea that your mental health has cancer.